First of all, I want to thank Lexcade for bringing this awesome website to my attention: Top 100 Evil Overlord Activities. It's all about how to become (and, more importantly, how to REMAIN) a successful Evil Overlord, and it's just fantastic. I remember seeing this years and years ago, but I'd almost forgotten about it. I may actually just copy & paste the whole darn thing up on my blog tomorrow, because it's Just. That. Awesome.
Ok, I found this little gem online a while back, and I just had to share it with everyone. I'm not sure who wrote it, but he or she is a genius:
O proud left foot, that ventures quick within
Then soon upon a backward journey lithe
Anon, once more the gesture, then begin:
Command sinistral pedestal to writhe.
Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Poke,
A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl.
To spin! A wilde release from Heaven's yoke.
Blessed dervish! Surely canst go, girl.
The Hoke, the poke -- banish now thy doubt!
Verily, I say, 'tis what it's all about.