1. What’s the first thing you wash in the shower?
Pajamas
2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
That’s racist, yo.
3. Do you plan outfits?
I don’t. It’s just so confusing. I go into the closet, throw on the first shirt I find, yell ‘Democracy!’ and run for my car.
4. How do you feel?
With my hands, mostly. I used to mostly use my telekinetic abilities to feel things, but the last time I tried that, I burned my brain on the stove. Ouchy!
5. What’s the closest thing to you that’s red?
Blood. Mine, theirs, it’s literally everywhere. In my veins, on the walls, ground in to the carpet fibers…it just never ends.
6. What’s the last dream you remember?
Something to do with making vegetarian stew from those fake fuzzy Easter chicks and boiled hamster meat. Oh, wait; you meant while I was asleep?
7. Did you meet anybody new today?
The others living in my head have taken in several new roommates. I don’t know their names yet, but I guess the economy’s hitting everyone pretty hard.
8. What do you crave?
Foam rubber hats and pencil shavings
9. Do you floss?
Only with guest towels
10. What comes to mind at the word ‘cabbage?’
Scrumtrillescent. See? I can make up words, too.
11. Are you emotional?
Why would you say that to me? Do you WANT me to set your car on fire! Haha, it’s ok. I’m over it! :) I love you so much! I’m just so sad sometimes, and then so angry, and then so happy! Why are you looking at me like that? I’ll cut you, you fat, beautiful, ignorant, scrawny, mean, adorable, stupid genius! Now I'm crying again. See what you've done???
12. Can you count backward from 74?
I can only count backward from odd numbers, and only when it’s raining men, say Hallelujah.
13. Do you bite or lick your ice cream?
Yes
14. Do you like cottage cheese?
Only as a friend. Why? Did it ask about me?
15. Ever walked into a wall?
Sadly, my superpower of being unsubstantial only works when I’m not trying to move through walls. I think it’s achieved sentience and it gets a kick out of making me look like a fool.
16. Would you throw potatoes at George W. Bush?
I think my head has enough holes in it without the Secret Service creating new and exciting ones, thank you.
17. Do you hate more than 3 people?
Not all at the same time. I find that rationing out my hatred leads to shorter prison terms.
18. Is your hair straight?
The last time I asked, my hair snapped at me, called me a ‘breeder,’ and said it was none of my business. Then it put on a plaid shirt & army boots and went to a monster truck rally. I’m so confused.
19. Boys or girls?
Both tasty, especially with a little oregano and parmesan, slow roasted in a brown butter sauce.
20. How do you turn on the TV?
I dip the remote in peanut butter and do a sexy little dance.
Got an idea for a question? A whole whoppin' list of questions? Email them to me; they just might get used during my next 'Creativity Exercise!' Beckahrah @ gmail.com
That was laugh out loud funny. I especially liked 12 & 14. And 16, 17, 18. And, well, most of them. Thanks for the laugh. :)
ReplyDeleteVery funny! Smart AND cute... no wonder the cottage cheese was asking about you...
ReplyDelete