1. Your parents tell you you’re moving far away. What do you do?
Throw a hissy fit, run away to the neighbor’s treehouse, live off snickers bars and root beer for a day or two, then remember I’m all growed up and married with a house of my own, and get back to work before someone fires me. Also, put my parents in a home for thinking I still live with them.
2. What would you do if your best friend started acting like he/she liked you as more than a friend?
Stop watching porn together & practice-kissing each other. Clearly that crazy b*tch has gotten the wrong idea somehow.
3. Where do you see yourself in five years?
A mirror or other reflective surface
4. What do you like to do when you’re in the car?
5. Do you listen to music?
No, I smell it.
6. Ever moved?
Never. I’ve been in the exact same position since I was born. Makes it a challenge to type.
7. What was the last reason you threw up?
Excessive, unrelenting nausea.
8. What’s your middle name?
The one between my first and last names
9. What is the worst sound ever?
The brown noise
10. Speak any other language?
Aio, quantitas magna frumentorum est!
11. What’s your favorite type of flower?
The kind you bake with (I think you spelled it wrong).
12. Can you live without your cell phone?
Not for long. I’m using it as a makeshift kidney at the moment.
13. Can you say the ABC’s backward?
The ABC's backward
14. Can you give advice?
Of course I can. I wouldn’t use it if I were you.
15. Are you a pathological liar
16. Are you fighting with anyone?
Yes, it makes typing this really difficult.
17. What’s the last thing you ate?
18. Have you ever had a birthday?
No, I’m still a newborn. I have this nagging sensation that I’ll never live up to my potential.
19. Favorite time of year?
20. Do you think two people can last forever?
If they’re loaded up with enough preservatives, I suppose.